(An amazing writer and I collaborated to write this piece. It’s a piece on an issue that’s been disturbing us especially in my country. So we decided to write on it and bring it to light. You can check out her amazing works here. She’s a motivational and inspirational writer)
In my home state, a certain news has been dominating social media and the news channels for some time now. It’s about a 14 year old girl who left home for a while and when she was finally found, she was staying with 2 guys with whom she was having sex. It sparked outrage on social media and people were disgusted at the whole thing.
This got me thinking, who is actually to blame?
The guys who passed around a minor for weeks (which is a serious offence by the way), the girl who is seen to be too young for such things and is seen as immoral, or the parents of the girl who have been termed as irresponsible and unable to instill discipline in their child.
Most people lean more to putting the blame on the parents. That is if the parents had done their duty in training the child well, and had a certain level of discipline, such a thing would never have happened and I think I agree with that to an extent. I think parents need to have a certain level of control over their children. If you can’t control your child, or if you give your child too much freedom from a young age, you should be ready to deal with the consequences of whatever happens.
This happened because the parents neglected their duty towards their child’s upbringing. I mean, how can your daughter leave home for over a month and you have absolutely no idea where she was. So many things could have gone wrong in this situation.
What if the men were evil with really cruel intentions? What if they had killed her? This is an issue that needs to be tackled with urgency.
The issue of parents neglecting their top most priority in the upbringing of their children is very alarming to the society and thus must be dealt with.
Parents are considered caretakers of their children here on earth according to the word of God, that means each time they fail to carry out their duty effectively, they don’t get paid (blessings).
As a person, before embarking on the journey of parenthood, you need to check yourself and get a better understanding of what parenthood is all about.
Who is a parent?
Parenting is derived from the verb to parent meaning to provide care and bring up children.
A parent is in charge of the physical, emotional, psychological, material needs, and the development of a child.
Parenthood goes beyond attending to a child’s needs materially etc. It is the act of showing all-round support, love and care towards a child.
- Emotionally – A parent must be able to tell the emotional needs of their child or ward. That includes guiding them through their love life and affairs etc.
- Psychologically – Parent attends to a child’s psychological needs by guiding their thought pattern from evil to beneficial things.
- Physically – A parent is meant to inculcate good manners/behavioural patterns in the life of their children or wards physically.
- Spiritually – Amongst all, this is the most important part. Parents are meant to teach their children the ways of the lord.
When you’re able to dish out these duties effectively only then can you be referred to as a parent but when you fail it serves as a slap to you and the society at large.
Some effects of relaxed parental upbringing
- Lack of discipline: The child will grow up to be an adult lacking in discipline and home training. The reason we have so many uncultured people today is due to lack of proper upbringing when they were at the vital stage where they needed it most.
- Unhealthy sex life: I don’t support sex as a minor. I think sex should be had as an adult when you can be held accountable for each and every decision you make. Sex as a minor only serves to implicate the older party who will be held as an offender. Children shouldn’t have sex. And when the right training is lacking, you have a lot of underage kids indulging in sexual activities when they are not ready for it.
- Lack of communication: children whose parents are not there find it hard to communicate whenever they are having problems. This is very dangerous as kids could be going through a lot, even sexual abuse, with no one to talk to. And so they suffer in silence. And the parents only get aware when it’s too late and the damage has already been done.
- Negative influence of Social media: We have a lot of things on social media that can affect child or influence him or her in a negative way. The girl involved in the scandal said she met one of the guys on facebook and he invited her over. Parents have to watch out and monitor their children’s movements, and social media, especially the female child. A lot of horrible things have happened to females because they trusted someone they met on social media.
- Peer pressure: it’s very easy to fall victim to peer pressure. And if parents are not around to train and take care of their children, they will easily succumb to peer pressure. Which is why parents should keep a watchful eye on their kids and who they hang out with.
Hello great minds.. I hope this piece was educative enough. Please leave a comment below telling us how you feel about this post.
©MimiCares & Missbluw